How to look after customers by raistlin

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I've been having some trouble with one of my keyboards just recently so I contacted Hewlett Packard on their web-site today via their "chat" system to talk to a tech support bod.

Bit of background first. Mother died just before Christmas last year but being organized, had bought and sent all her Christmas presents, part of which, in my case was a new wireless keyboard and mouse to use with my personal lappy when at work.


during the chat I got the usual tedious platitudes and stock phrases and eventually I was asked for the serial and part numbers of my keyboard and mouse.

Apparently, tech bod couldn't find details in his system and after a discussion about that not really being anything I had control over, as I had quoted all the information he had asked for, we were getting nowhere because his script clearly didn't allow for anything other than a very narrow sequence of dialogue.

Eventually he told me to take the matter up with the original supplier and I had to explain that I had no way of doing so because it had been a present and that my Mother, the original purchaser, was now deceased.

Out came the stock phrases along the lines of "I am unable to find details on my system so cannot progress this matter."

In exasperation and some emotion, I explained that it was very inconvenient of Mother to have died when she did but I'm sure the Sale of Goods Act might expect the OEM to take such events in to account, considering the equipment was less than three months old. Whether or not I was entirely correct I'm not sure but even if no basis in consumer law, I would imagine that any OEM, with an eye to good will, would try to help.

The reply?

"I am unable to find details on my system so cannot progress this matter. Why not just go and buy a replacement?"

Customer relations skills? Nil points I believe.

Those of you who know me will not be surprised to learn that although I cancelled the "chat", I didn't leave the matter there.

Cogito ergo sum... maybe?

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Posted 03 Mar 2016, 17:39 #1 

Last edited by raistlin on 03 Mar 2016, 20:57, edited 1 time in total.

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It's called putting the customer at the heart of everything we do Paul !

We had a new plotter in the office a couple of years ago , cost about £8000 and made by HP

We had many teething problems with it so had to contact HP with the serial number etc only to be told they couldn't help as it wasn't their machine !
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Planning is an unnatural process, much better to just get on with things, that way failure comes as a complete surprise instead of being preceeded by a period of worry and doubt

Posted 03 Mar 2016, 19:38 #2 

Just be thankful that it was merely a keyboard and you had not called 111 or 999 and been told:

"I am unable to find details on my system so cannot progress this matter"

Welcome to the age of the moron.

That apart Mrs Lincoln, did you enjoy the play


Posted 03 Mar 2016, 22:51 #3 

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Borg Warner
Patently the computer said "no".

Gary M.

Posted 04 Mar 2016, 22:23 #4