Insurant by geesmith

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Insurant In*sur"rant [From insure - rant] To rave in violent, high-sounding, or extravagant language,
without dignity of thought; to be noisy, boisterous, and
bombastic in talk or declamation about insurers[2011 Smith]

In Feb last year I pulled in to the side of the road in my Skoda Octavia TDi estate to allow an oncoming vehicle to proceed over a speed hump between two parked cars. I then moved off, uphill, and remained in 1st gear as I negotiated the hump. It was one of those that span the width of the road. As I came down the other side there was a loud clunk as though the air dam had grounded. I made a mental note to check it at some point.
A short distance further on the oil light came on. I was in busy city centre traffic with nowhere to stop without obstructing flow but knew there was a DIY store up ahead with a spacious car park. As I was heading for the car park entrance the engine became noisy and I shut it down without locking the steering and coasted to safety.
As I got out I could see my route marked with a thin line of oil.
Having been towed back to my usual mechanics premises I called one of my engineers and organised a lift home for the end of the day. My mechanic phoned in the afternoon to say there was a hole the size of a fifty pence in the sump and he suggested I return home via the same route to get photo's of the speed hump which I did. I found a half house brick hiding behind the speed hump and immediately the trail of oil began.
The next day I reported this to my insurers who advised me that I should put in a claim. I followed this advice (grrrr) and was told an independent engineer would examine the car shortly. A month later the engineer turned up, examined this small hole in the sump and declared that the car would be a write off as it was 8 years old and probably had particles in the engine that could kill the turbo. " Don't worry, you're fully comp and they'll sort it for you". (GRRRRRRR!)
I was paid out two thirds of the cars purchase cost.
Since then every time I insure a vehicle I have to declare that I've made a claim, that no-one else was involved, that I "collided" with an inanimate object. The net result seems to be that my premium is 4 or 5 hundred quid higher than if I didn't collide with an inanimate object.
Hence, in my current situation, the 75 and the van certainly had to go. For the next 4 years I will be avoiding filling out insurance documents. My wife will do that and I will occasionally legally drive her car.

This wouldn't be quite so bad if, on the day I was advised to put in a claim by the ladies reproductive organ in the insurers office that they would pursue Sheffield Council for compensation. They have since denied that they would ever follow that course of action and I have discovered that Sheffield Council are very tight indeed with compensation in regard to their questionable speed humps. Shortly after buying the 75 I suffered another sickening bang as i drove over one of their tank traps. This time i stopped in the road immediately and was relieved to find no leaks. This speed hump didn't span the whole road as it was one of those Dairy Milk sections, nay more of a Yorkie chunk that strangely get referred to as speed know, the ones that are several millimetres higher than regulation allows with deep gouges along the top.

In hindsight I should have had the sump replaced, engine flushed, risked it with the Octavia.

Not finished ranting yet...

The insurers for the van couldn't draw their monthly winnings from my bank as they had recorded my account number incorrectly. It took them three months to inform me that "due to being unable to take payment for my insurance I should contact them immediately and give them another bank account or they would take action etc etc etc". THREE MONTHS!!....yet a week before contacting me they took £177.00 from my account?!? Plonkers.

Not finished still...

The insurers of the 75 were informed that I no longer had the car and wished to terminate my policy. No probs, you will owe us the balance of £44.01 to terminate, no probs.
One week later, they are demanding immediate settlement of £44.01, immediate return of the policy "it is an offence to drive the vehicle etc etc". WHY DIDN'T THEY JUST TAKE THE PAYMENT FROM MY ACCOUNT WHERE THEY NORMALLY TAKE THEIR INSTALLMENT?? or at least explain that they wouldn't do that in the circumstances....


The van insurer also want a copy of my driving licence and proof of my no claims bonus all of a sudden. They say I should have received it from the insurer when I finished with them after last year. If they don't receive it within 7 days of this letter they have been authorised to cancel my policy (another request for the policy returning and threats of action etc) only complaint being that THEY WERE MY VAN INSURER LAST YEAR SO WHY OH WHY OH WHY..??? :panic: :rolling: :hissyfit:



Having so much time on my hands I will be sending some very carefully worded replies to my insurers. I will probably want to know why one of them, when obviously offering work experience to young people, doesn't vet the letters they send or at least ensure that sufficient training is administered before allowing these persons to communicate directly with customers.(perhaps I'll put insure instead of ensure). I'll also suggest that they have brought me to realise I no longer require a van and therefore have decided to sell the vehicle and will be terminating my policy.... or should I go the route of having become depressed and suicidal following my recent loss of employment and the spate of heartless communications I have that would be completely wasted, they would probably inform me that they would have to take this information into account should I prove to have life cover with them.

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 02:33 #1 

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You couldn't make it up could you.....
Photobucket = Tossers


Posted 05 Dec 2011, 07:12 #2 

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:roll: ...and i didn't Dave. I had full no claims before I stupidly drove into the stationary object that totalled my have 5 years.

Perhaps I should have paid extra to protect the no claims against my insurers..

Perhaps we should consider adding uninsured third party cover to the Mazda in case some uninsured person runs into us costing us another write off and loss of my wifes full no claims...

Talking about third party, it's become like golden hens teeth of late. You have to have fully comp....probably to lull you into actually using it to make a legitimate claim, but only if you don't mind the vehicle being at risk of becoming a devalued write off...and only if you paid extra to protect your no claims.

I understand this is all as a result of unscrupulous people taking advantage of their insurers ..but I was never one of them.

If they give you advice about something in a reassuring tone hold back until you've scoured the web for better advice. They don't work in your best interests, they assume you're that scammer that once fiddled them and they're going to recoup some losses at your expense. If that includes a "collided with stationary object" all the better, they're set for the next 5 years.

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 11:49 #3 

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geesmith wrote:The van insurer also want a copy of my driving licence and proof of my no claims bonus all of a sudden. They say I should have received it from the insurer when I finished with them after last year. If they don't receive it within 7 days of this letter they have been authorised to cancel my policy (another request for the policy returning and threats of action etc) only complaint being that THEY WERE MY VAN INSURER LAST YEAR SO WHY OH WHY OH WHY..??? :panic: :rolling: :hissyfit:

I had the same request for my car insurance. (Insured with the same insurer once they price matched).
They still wanted a copy of the proof of no claims bonus even though they had sent it to me.

Just going through some fun and games with the house insurance.
The company I was with renewed the policy without telling me and I had already arranged it with another company.

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 12:57 #4 

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They're constantly circling ready to pick your carcass.

After paying through the nose for your insurance and getting through as far as renewal without making a claim why is it your premium goes up £100 ? Is that the penalty for NOT
hitting a stationary object?

I bet they're rubbing their hands in glee in Japan today.....

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 13:36 #5 

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>>>"collided with stationary object"<<< does make you sound careless Glynn, maybe if you had put "ran over concealed object", the peeps concerned wouldn't have understood what you were on about, and not wishing to sound foolish, have paid up in full.. :D

Sorry to hear of all the problems you are getting.. Shame about the Skoda too, I rather fancy one of those myself... best to keep that to yourself though, this being an MG_Rover site innit.. Nod-nod wink-wink innit... :D

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 18:26 #6 

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The problem Jimbob is that you don't get to explain. You don't get to put what you think is most correct.
You made a claim, tick,
no-one else involved, tick,
then there's a limited number of options that all make you look like a careless plonker and you can only tick the one that's vaguely nearest to the truth, i.e. collision with stationary object (which could be a concealed brick or a bus stop with spotlights illuminating it). The obvious limitations serve the insurers well. If it was only about re-imbursing wronged people it would be okay but it isn't is it.

If I'd been travelling at speed over that hump the sump would probably have cleared the brick. The only box I can tick which is nearest the truth is the same box you'll tick if you lose control whilst exceeeding the speed limit and collide with a telephone box.

The MG/Rover community are aware of what a good car is Jimbob. There's hardly ever any of that immature discrimination here. :D

Posted 05 Dec 2011, 22:05 #7 

Ah, but insurers are not there to help the motorist, homeowner etc they are there to make money for their shareholders as is any company. The more they take in premiums and the less they pay out the more profit and the more pay and bonuses their directors get.

That apart Mrs Lincoln, did you enjoy the play


Posted 06 Dec 2011, 07:48 #8 

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You know how Doctors have a sign in the windscreen that says Doctor......if directors of insurance companies did the same they would run the risk of forever running into the back of someone. :D

There's probably a separate form for them to fill in where they become some kind of stationary object.


"Is this your vehicle sir? Have you contributed to the compulsory insurance scam?"

Posted 06 Dec 2011, 10:36 #9 

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Well, as Dave said, "you couldn't make it up".

Last week, the van insurers sent me a ream of paperwork....3 3 separate IDENTICAL letters. They informed me on page one that they had been requested to cancel my insurance (3 times apparently). I phoned them and they said they didn't have to cancel it if I completed the areas that had been marked with I trawled through and (re)inserted the info where they had highlighted, scanned the relevant pages and attached them to an email.
Later I received a phone call. I had missed one of the pages. After some discussion we agreed that they had missed highlighting this page (that'll be 3 times then). I re-stated that the van would be parked on the drive overnight, scanned it and attached it to an email. That was Tuesday of last week. On Friday of last week I received two almost identical letters. The only difference being one was registered post and one was first class. The contents were the same front page of the last (3) letters.
"We are authorised by your insurers (name omitted here though it's the same as the straight at Le Mans) to act as their agent for the purposes of cancelling insurance cover and give you notice that all cover on your vehicle registration YOURVAN is cancelled as from 7 days from the date of this letter. You are requested...etc...all that stuff about me being a criminal if I don't mail back their bits of paper so I can't use them unlawfully etc..and pompously citing the Road Traffic Act etc.

So today I contacted them by phone.
Call one.
Me: Wassup now?
THEM: You didn't sign page 2.
Me: Oh, it wasn't requested. I'll do it now.

I then find that page 2 is signed and attached tom last weeks email.

Phone call 2.
Me: I signed the Credit agreement on page 2.
THEM: No the other page 2 on Le Mans straights document. It says page 2 of 3 at the bottom.

Phone call 3.
Me: There's nowhere to sign on that page. It just confirms the info I already gave.
THEM: Just a moment, I'll print it off and have a look.
Me: Sigh..........................drumming of fingers....
THEM: We're very sorry that page doesn't need signing and everything is in order.

Maybe on Wednesday they'll just send one letter cancelling my cover...

Posted 12 Dec 2011, 13:58 #10 

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Dare you to send them a bill for your triplicate :D :D :D
Photobucket = Tossers


Posted 12 Dec 2011, 19:26 #11 

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Dare accepted. I'll get out the calculator. ;)

Posted 12 Dec 2011, 19:43 #12 

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Oh dear ... :roll:

geesmith wrote:THEM: We're very sorry that page doesn't need signing and everything is in order.

I hope you won't get into trouble with the police some day, them thinking you're one of these stupid uninsured drivers.

75ZT Community & Midlands Nano Meets & 75&ZT Enthusiasts

Posted 12 Dec 2011, 20:36 #13 

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The highlighted page didn't need a signature, nor was there anywhere to sign.

The chances become slimmer by the hour Jürgen. I haven't driven the van since taking the deposit. The guy that put the deposit on the van contacted me to say he's coming for it tonight so a cancellation will be in order as soon as it leaves the drive. I will then be a named driver on my wifes insurance for the foreseeable future. We should probably affix some eyelashes to the headlights to emphasize her status as the main driver (which is statistically correct). In my next job I'll either drive a company vehicle or a Nissan Figaro or an Austin Mini. Ooh! cheapest car to insure is a VW Beetle (all things being equal)(and maybe change my name to Glynnis):)

Posted 13 Dec 2011, 12:14 #14 

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Still not making it up....

I contacted the insurers to cancel the insurance. I'm informed that they will send me paperwork to explain the various ways that I can pay the £309 that I owe to end the policy early. I suspect we may have a difference of opinion at some point. I'll be contacting my old friends C.A.B. once I have the documents. Since taking out this policy I haven't driven 1000 miles and I certainly haven't made a claim. I have witnessed one blooper after the other though. I suppose this fee goes towards the cost of receiving multi-page documents in triplicate...ermm...documents that told me they were going to cancel if I didn't fill them in and return them (because they'd apparently mislaid the originals).

Posted 20 Dec 2011, 13:41 #15 

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Time for a visit to this again I'm afraid.

Took out a new policy a couple of weeks ago, and when on the phone was told that if I took out the personal injury cover, it also covered me that if I was hit by an uninsured driver it wouldn't affect my no claims. I checked twice I understood what he was telling me and said the personal injury part was no use, but the protection against uninsured drivers was.

Read the policy book in full today. Guess what, it doesn't cover that at all, he was making it up to add £20 to each policy.

Cancelled, and complaint sent in.

Do they not learn about misselling? God I wish there was an insurance company that you could actually trust a bit instead of all being complete bankers.

Posted 26 Jan 2012, 20:14 #16 

Duncan wrote:Do they not learn about misselling? God I wish there was an insurance company that you could actually trust a bit instead of all being complete bankers.

No, they learn about the commission to be earned

That apart Mrs Lincoln, did you enjoy the play


Posted 26 Jan 2012, 20:21 #17 

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The £309 they wanted from me was reduced to £259.43 by the time the paperwork arrived. I told them I would be contesting it and could they send me a breakdown of the charges. They then offered me a reduction to £180.06. I eventually chose to settle at this amount and twice had to correct the girl who was taking the payment as she said £180.60. Having checked the account, they have indeed taken £180.60 instead of £180.06. Armed with my letter that states £180.06 I'm going to chase them for a refund. Hopefully they'll do it in triplicate, as is their wont.


The companies I strongly advise that you avoid are A&A, My Motor Quote and Mulsanne insurance. It could be that some of these are relatively innocent but the people I was dealing with were spreading their excuses across all three so A&A have implicated the other two either correctly or otherwise and I've paid enough to care less.

Being the type of person that pays insurance opens you up to this kind of abuse. I hope some of the sn0tty two hats sitting in those offices are prepared for redundancy as we enter phase two of recession.

Posted 29 Jan 2012, 12:44 #18