Remarkable cheek by raistlin (Page 2 of 2)


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Zeb
Sounds spot on actually Paul... :D

Unfortunately the 'social norms' these children tend to grow up with do not help them, either in their adolescence nor as adults in wider society, hence the cycle becomes repeated.....not least because like attracts like :(

Posted 07 Oct 2010, 08:20 #21 

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JakeWilson
I have Jeremy Kyle now on the tele in the background - think your Chavette's are on here!

Posted 07 Oct 2010, 08:52 #22 

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MrB
raistlin wrote:
Dallas wrote:What really upsets me about these sort of people is the way they speak to their own young children, they will use the 'F' while shouting at they little toddlers with so much anger and expression (it blooming scares me, what ever would the poor little one must feel) well I just don't know.... :roll:


Children are remarkably resilient and have an amazing capacity for adaptation. In the normal course of events, that is a good thing.

Unfortunately, it also means that a foul-mouthed, shouting parent is soon adapted to as well, making the child believe that such behaviour is the norm. I've seen it time and time again when the children are older and end up in youth court :(

There is another, and in my view, more dangerous aspect to this adaptation. Under normal circumstances, where parental interaction is quiet, and non-aggressive, the parent always has the shock value of a shout to warn the child of imminent danger. For example, if the child was about to shove a steel nail into a household electricity socket (as I did :em: ) and the parent is not within arm's reach, the shout can be effective in the child's mind as being an unusual and powerful incentive to stop immediately. Shock and surprise effect if you like.

If the child has grown accustomed to shouting and aggressive verbal behaviour, the parent no longer has that ability to divert from imminent danger. Just my view of course and probably at odds with the expert views of child psychologists :)

:iagree: From personal experience, as someone who has the honour of trying to teach the next generation. The best teachers I have come across hardly ever have to raise their voice, they tend to use tone of voice instead.

Exactly as you have said, if that teacher were to raise their voice, it would have an immediate impact.

It is something I am constantly trying to improve in my own teaching. The more you shout the less impact it has.

So you are quite right.
Chris
Member No. 143
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Posted 07 Oct 2010, 10:58 #23 

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Dallas
raistlin wrote:
Dallas wrote:What really upsets me about these sort of people is the way they speak to their own young children, they will use the 'F' while shouting at they little toddlers with so much anger and expression (it blooming scares me, what ever would the poor little one must feel) well I just don't know.... :roll:


Children are remarkably resilient and have an amazing capacity for adaptation. In the normal course of events, that is a good thing.

Unfortunately, it also means that a foul-mouthed, shouting parent is soon adapted to as well, making the child believe that such behaviour is the norm. I've seen it time and time again when the children are older and end up in youth court :(

There is another, and in my view, more dangerous aspect to this adaptation. Under normal circumstances, where parental interaction is quiet, and non-aggressive, the parent always has the shock value of a shout to warn the child of imminent danger. For example, if the child was about to shove a steel nail into a household electricity socket (as I did :em: ) and the parent is not within arm's reach, the shout can be effective in the child's mind as being an unusual and powerful incentive to stop immediately. Shock and surprise effect if you like.

If the child has grown accustomed to shouting and aggressive verbal behaviour, the parent no longer has that ability to divert from imminent danger. Just my view of course and probably at odds with the expert views of child psychologists :)



Very well said. :iagree:

Its so upsetting for the child at the beginning but then as you say they soon become resilient to the type of behavior from their so called parent, which then fuels the fire for thats child's future to do the same and become aggressive as they think its the norm.

It totally frustrates me when I see this go on, I have many-a-time said to the mother and a farther on one occasion 'is it really necessary to speak to your child that way, with so much anger and hatred' :mad1: you can imagine the answer I receive........ but! I don't care..... because as long as I have said this to the so called parent, I then think at least I have planted a seed in that one brain cell that these people have......... and maybe it might get them to think and may change their ways for the future to become a loving responsible and caring parent.........

I only wish....... ;)
Image

Posted 07 Oct 2010, 11:10 #24 


goodlittlewifey
I agree, I remember one occasion where I saw a mother actually slap her little one right across the face and leave a
really bad red mark.,the little one looked about 2 years old, I was livid, I marched straight up to her and said if I EVER see you do that again I will take the child away from you and do exactly what youve just done to your child to you, she replied its non of your f****** business, I replied that child abuse is everyones business, She then threatened to report me to the police, I just said please do,It will give me great pleasure explaining to them why I did it, and just so you know I took a picture of you and your child on my phone, and if I see you in the paper because of something you did to your child, I will show my evidence to the police,
Now obviously the chavette doesnt know its illegal to film someone without consent, and I hadnt actually done it, I just hoped that holding the threat over her head MIGHT make her treat her little child a bit better, One can only hope

Posted 08 Oct 2010, 04:02 #25 


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